Mark Wagner's Life

This Is Your Life, Are You Who You Want To Be?

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Updated May 6, 2004
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Thursday, March 23, 2006 #

Here is a great site with some pretty funny videos.  I absolutely love the insurance commercial from the little boy.  His expression and honesty is simply perfect.

http://patamo.blogspot.com/2006/03/funny-video-baby-got-book.html 

posted @ 7:57 AM | Feedback (2)

Wednesday, June 15, 2005 #

DAVID LETTERMAN'S TOP 10 DRAWBACK'S TO WORKING IN A CUBICLE

10. Being told to "think outside the box" when you're in a freakin' box
all day long.

9. Not being able to check e-mail attachments without turning around to
see who's behind you.

8. Cubicle walls do not offer much protection from any kind of gunfire.

7. That nagging feeling that if you press the right button, you'll get a
piece of cheese.

6. Lack of roof rafters for the noose.

5. The walls are too close together for the hammock to work right.

4. 23 power cords - 1 outlet.

3. Prison cells are not only bigger, they also have beds.

2. The carpet has been there since 1976 and shows more signs of life
than your co-workers.

And the NUMBER ONE drawback to working in a cubicle is:

1. You can't walk out and slam the door when you quit.

posted @ 8:00 AM | Feedback (2)

Tuesday, May 17, 2005 #

Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.
      - Abraham Lincoln

posted @ 2:32 PM | Feedback (1)

Monday, May 02, 2005 #

Become a go-giver,
not just a go-getter.
                   - Joe Batten

posted @ 4:46 PM | Feedback (0)

Thursday, March 10, 2005 #

I don't know who the author of this is, but its a keeper.

--------------------

Guys' Rules

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally, the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.)

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.   These are our rules!  Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.  That's what we do.  Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.  See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.  In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.  Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.  Not both.  If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color.  Pumpkin is also a fruit.  We have no idea what Mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.  We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing", we will act like nothing is wrong.  We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.  Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that?  It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh.

posted @ 10:26 AM | Feedback (9)

Friday, February 04, 2005 #

Life is good.

I have the best family I could ever hope for.  My wife is a guardian angel to me and my children.  She keeps me on the right path.  My children are growing and become all I could hope for.  They are intelligent, confident, responsible, and respectable young people; and smarter than I consider myself to be at their ages.  They have a good sense of right and wrong; good and bad.  Funny, smart, happy, respectful, courageous, and strong.  They make me proud.  What could be more important?  Nothing.  I pray for them.  Life is good.

Iraqi citizens showed their strength and courage by voting in suprising numbers.  There is still a monumental task ahead of them.  I hope America will remain strong supporters for Iraqi's; becuase, one day we may need their democraic support.  President Bush has taken this tremendous task and armed it with his strong and good set of moral values to face our enemies both in America and around the world.  Many object to this war.  This is not a bad thing, but one day they will realize how wrong they are.  I pray for him.  Life is good.

Life is good!

posted @ 2:00 PM

Wednesday, January 19, 2005 #

Last night there was an attempt to steal my truck.  The back window to the cab was apparently broken by throwing a steel towing hitch through it.  Glass everywhere inside the cab.  At this point, it doesn't appear they took much of anything.

This happened in the parking lot at work.  I headed home around 4:35p.  As I approached my truck I could see the hazard lights were on and the windshield wipers were full-wipe position.  I could tell something was not right so knew not to touch anything.  At first I could see little bits of broken dark tinted glass, but could not tell where it came from.  The car parked next to me looked fine and did nothave tinted windows.  I then peaked through the dark tinted driver-side window on my truck and could see a tow hitch and ball laying on the middle arm rest.  I knew that wasn't mine.  I then looked at the back window and could see a nice volleyball sized hole and the middle back window opened. This was a where they made thier entry.

Just then, the business park security pickup was making his rounds.  I wived him down and he waved back.  Then I waved at him to stop and he did.  The older genetleman was very helpful in contact the local police department.  He contacted his office using his handheld radio to report the incident where he was informed that a grounds keeper had reported rushing of two young teenagers.

I then opened the door, which was already unlocked, and began to visually inspect what damage was done.  The steering column was ripped apart with the ignition key switch in several pieces on the floor infront of the drivers seat.  From the steering column hung several wires and a small electrical plug.  Two wires in this pug were  apparently used to “hot-wire” the vehicle.  I also noticed the transmission was in Drive.  This tells me they had started the truck and tried to drive off.  I later found out from the Dodge dealership that some trucks will shut down the engine if the ignition switch is destroyed or tampered with.

The police arrived within 15 minutes after my discovery and was very helpful.  The business park manager, who had arrived about 30 minutes after my discovery.  Shw was trying to clearly understand and gather information; over the radio, from the business park employee who had reported running of two teenagers earlier that day.  The groundskeeper employee spoke spanish and his english was good, but not greate.  Then business park manager, the police officer, and the security officer were trying to make sure they had a clear understanding of what had happened and when.  I took a few attempts to clealy understand the events earlier that day, and to thank him for running them off.  They could have taken the entire truck.

These two “criminals“ were described by the grounds keeper as about 16 years of age, hispanic, and roughly 5' 5“ tall.  They left in a white van with a red stripe that ran along the side.  I think I would like to meet them sometime.  But, I'm probably better off forgetting about it.

Through all of this I was happy with the assistance I recieve from everyone involved.  Thus fare I have had very little contact with my insurace company, American Family Insurance.  My first impressions are not all that enthusiastic and I still hope for the best in getting good service from them.  Although my hopes are high, my expectations are not.  I hope to post additional comments about how my success with American Family Insurance.  We shall see.

Update: American Family Insurance bobbled the ball for a day and a half.  Then I contacted my agent directly and he “got it done.”  Thanks Kent!

posted @ 10:50 AM | Feedback (4)

Monday, January 10, 2005 #

Excellent music CD.  I enjoy the lyrics as much as the music.

“This Is Your Life”
”Are You Who You Want To Be”

posted @ 10:32 AM | Feedback (3)